Member-only story
Not as low-support needs as I thought?
Lately I have found myself thinking I am being a burden on 2 of my cousins. I have been needy for pride in me, since I don’t have a mama and daddy to be proud of me, anymore. Just yesterday I got excited to show daddy how I was restoring a dresser, then I realized I can’t. I’m still kind of in a break down over it…I have been needy for help with simple questions and tasks. I even thought I was maybe being scammed (again..) and in a panic needed help discerning something that is so easy for most, even other autistics, to understand.
These things got me thinking about how my ex kept explaining things to me, and I thought I understood, but then, apparently, I didn’t. It’s part of, if not entirely, what caused our breakup. I don’t think he believed I really didn’t understand. I think he probably thought the worst. It’s not just him, either. This has been an ongoing issue my whole life. I struggle with things that even other neurodivergents don’t struggle with.
I don’t have a noticeable intellectual disorder, I think it is just AuDHD. I hate when we are infantilized, but at the same time, I feel so childlike in many functions. That innocently thinking someone is cool with me and blabber on like everything is fine and they are beyond irritated at having to interact with me. It’s always a shock when I get yelled at, cause I had no idea they disliked me that…
